Chris, Well I did it!!! I called my birthmother today & it went fantastic. I followed your instructions and it all went well. I was very emotional. She gave me her address (which matches what you gave me) & wants me to definitely come and visit. I gave her my information & she was very receptive to the phone call.
I asked about her medical & she is healthy except for osteoarthritis which I also have. She has 3 children: 2 boys & a girl ( 2 in FL & 1 in NY). Her & her children are all fine. She has grandchildren & 1 great grandchild. She asked me to call later if I call during the week as she is still working part time!
My birthfather does know about me & I need coaching about contacting him when you have time. She has not had contact with him & said that she does not know if he is alive or where he is living just that he grew up in Astoria.
We discussed how we both hate the winter. She asked if I would please visit soon. When I told her that I live in FL she said that she has friends in FL that were from my town. I told her that I would mail her photos & she was going to do the same. I left it up to her if she wish to share me with her children. I told her that I had a wonderful childhood & she was so so thankful.
As I am to all of you!!
Thank you Thank you Thank you for fulfilling my dream. We will talk soon.
(Re: Follow-up) It has been just about one year and your were able to help me find my birthmother side of the family. Since then I have met my half sister and her family, what a great experience. In my meeting with her, we discovered that her birth certificate revels another sibling which of course neither of us knew about. What do you think the chances are of another search for that sibling? I am also trying to find my birthfather, however other then my half sister all others are deceased.
I just wanted to THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART for what you have given me and my first mom. We are proceeding slowly, which is okay with me. Her husband has been wonderful in all this and he is my main contact. They have not told my brothers yet but supposedly that will be done today - or maybe tomorrow... The face-to-face is scheduled for mid-June in Chicago (neutral territory) and I will be meeting "the rest of the family" in July in New York after the Adoptee Rights Demonstration in Philadelphia.
Thanks so much!
Hello Chris, I thought you would be happy to hear that my birthdaughter called me last night.
She told me that any of her personal friends that know her best would tell me that one of her worst fears was after her adoptive mom passed away that she would be alone in the world.
Now she is so happy to know that she has another mom and family. We had a wonderful talk. I think that I can be quite sure that all will fall into place. We have so much in common.
Thank you for what you do too. I will be forever grateful!
Bye for now, Linda
Not sure if you remember me, you found my biomom for me late in 2008.
I was not able to make contact with her right away, and then did not want to call over the Christmas holidays, and then she was screening her calls, but I guess finally curiosity got the better of her and she answered my call today.
I ca not even describe how great the moment was when I realized that she was as excited as I was. Everyone already knew about me, she shared with her husband right away and was crying and shaking. But she composed herself quickly (more than I can say for myself!) and we talked for a good while. She is going to put me in touch with my half sisters, since she does not have email herself, and I am excited for that, too! And I am going to send her photos... she was not 100% sure who my biofather was, maybe that will clear things up, I do not know.
Anyway it went really well, I think, and again thank you so much for not just finding her but all of your guidance about how to make this contact! Please let me know if there is more that I should be aware of or should make sure I do - your insights when we talked were really helpful and there was a ton I had not considered.
Best of everything to you, Audrey.................ND
Your office found my birth mother for me back in 2001 and it was a success story. My mother was very young when I was born and no husband/boyfriend to help so after 10 months she gave me up for what she thought would be a better life. So some it up, we are close and both are very glad about finding each other.
Just thought about you and wanted to update you.
CT - North Car
Thank you Kinsolving for doing what many consider "impossible". I wish everyone searching for lost family will have their own liberating experience someday soon. It is priceless!
Thank you soooooooooooo much! We are really excited because we just heard from his adoptive mother. She is welcoming our family with open arms. Mom found she has two more grandchildren! This is all so excited. He is in prison, but the charge is not as serious as the sentence suggests. So we are relieved about that.
Thank you again for making my mothers (and my) dream come true.
I spoke with my daughter today. All went perfect. She was calm, sweet, understanding, and very kind to me. She did not know that she was adopted but wondered because her parents were older.
Thank you for such wonderful guidance!!! We are going to get to know each other. Our conversation went wonderfully! I am so thankful and happy!
I will let you know how things go.
I can never say thank you enough!
Sincerely, Linda ...WA
You gave me such good advice which I did follow. I am so thrilled that it went so well. I think she might tell her children, she asked for my email address because her daughter has a lot of the photos.
I feel like I am living in a dream world thanks to all of you! Please say a special thanks to all who were involved in my case! Thanks so much for all your wonderful help.
I am having a perfect reunion with my birth mother, new step dad, two younger brothers, and multiple aunts, uncles, and cousins! What a joy to find so many new family members that I did not even know existed a month ago!
Thank you so much for the information you sent – I would never have looked in that County, it was 100 miles or more from where my family had been told! I don’t know how you do it, but I am glad that you can!
Like probably every other person receiving such information, I do not have the first idea what to do with it! I’m sorry my birth mother is gone since she alone has some of the answers I wanted. But I have two siblings, although I do not know if they know anything about me. Several months ago I received a call from a woman who worked for Kinsolving. She was a birth mother herself, if I remember correctly, and was very kind and understanding. I believe she said that kinsolving would help at least support me to some extent in the contact by helping me with knowledge kinsolving had gained in all these years of such searches. I know that the site talks about assisting with advice and the “do and do nots”. So, I would like some of that advice and support if that is possible. I can not imagine just calling and saying “HEY, guess who?” LOL
BTW, it turns out that for about 14 years (on and off), I lived within 15 miles of my birth mother and her family and from 1999-2004, I lived about 5 miles from my half brother. Life can be so strange.
Thank you again, I am thoroughly impressed by how quickly you managed to get all this information.
NB ... GA
I love you guys!
I heard from Gaye and Cari that you found for them, and Natalie too! You rock!
I am flying out from the UK to the States to meet my Mom this weekend and staying for two weeks. It is all thanks to you and I wanted to thankyou thankyouthankyouthankyou
Huge hugs of appreciation
Heather in the UK
Born 6/28/1970 Syracuse NY
ps. We will be at the Adoptee Rights Protest in Philadelphia before going on to Syracuse to meet the rest of the family
I Hi there!
I have successfully contacted my birthmother, and we are slowly getting to know each other. It has
definitely been a positive outcome for us both. Thank you so much for doing such a fabulous job!
Wendy - Michigan
Dear Chris and Staff,
Thank you, thank you thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!I I ca not even begin to tell you how happy I am that you have found my brother. You are an angel sent from heaven to me. Now my 15 year mystery is nearly over. I hope that my contact with him goes as well as the case went for you and your staff. Please know that what you have done will make me grateful forever.
Again I ca not say thank you enough,
I do want to thank Kinsolving for finding my son. I started searching when he turned 18. You were the third company I had hired and I really did not have any expectations about him being found. When I received the information I was shocked. Matthew lives 5 min. from my house. Even though he was not told he was adopted he had some doubt and we talked for 30 min. the first night I called him. Within a week we went together for a DNA test and that confirmed it. It was a great feeling finally knowing who he is. Thank you and everyone involved that helped with my case.
After searching for 27 years, I ran across your company on April 17, 1991 quite by accident. After speaking with you all, it was only a week, April 23 when you called and said you all had found my son. By 10 AM the next morning I had my sons name, address, and phone #. At 8 pm I spoke with my son for the first time.
There are no words to express the feeling of finding my son. I felt like I had my heart removed years before and all of the sudden it started beating. I have written about my experience in my new book, Pieces of my Heart, which will soon be released.Thank you for giving me back my only child He looks just like me and so do his kids:)
God Bless you for this wonderful service.Although it has been a long time I think of you often and am forever grateful. Please feel free to put me on the reference list.
Keep up the good work. As long as records remain closed and adoptees are treated as 2nd class citizens, services like yours may be the only means for adoptees to actually get what is their birthright. God bless you and Chris and all the staff of Kinsolving.
Well, that is it then. you guys were awesome, I really appreciate it. I am envious of the fact that your job has the capacity to bring so much meaningful joy into peoples lives. If I can not send you wine or some silly stereotypical California touristy item, hopefully I will at least get a chance to pass some referrals your way if I encounter anyone searching!
Jerry - Louisiana
Just wanted to give you an update.....I have made contact with my birthfamily in a very positive way! We have been emailing, sending pics and talking on the phone since April. I have spoken to all remaining siblings except for one. I am flying to SC (Charolotte and onto Florence) next Thursday. If everything goes according to plan I will be able to meet them all! It should be interesting. I am so glad you were able to get me the information! The regret is that I did not do it sooner!
Take care, Dee (not sure if you keep records ect and do not see a reference number to tell you who I am........)
Dee - Georgia
To All @ Kinsolving,
There is a saying in Italian Mille Grazie (a thousand thank you) & these 1st meeting photos with my Birthmother & her daugher, my half sister during my trip to FL say it all. I still cry when I look at them.
I think of you all the time & how you have brought so much happiness into my life. I have both NY & FL 2nd families. My life has come full circle & the questions & wondering in my mind is finally at peace. I am whole and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Sometimes I still ca not believe it!
God Bless You All!
A very grateful Ellen ....NY
Hey, this is Mamie Rand. I have not spoken to you in several months, but I am happy to report that all is well with the adoption search you helped me with in March. My father has been totally embraced by his family and I do not have one negative thing to report. Just last week his birth mothers oldest sister died and he was able to meet so many more family members at the aunts funeral. This is all such a great story.
Thank You - Thank you, Mamie..............SC
In March 2008 Kinsolving found my Mother. I never thought it would happen and it is a dream come true. Being so far away is hard, I now live in the UK and she is still in the States, but we speak on the telephone often and have exchanged many pictures and stories.
I registered with the NY State adoption information registry in 1993, receiving my non-identifying information in 1994. Some of that information came from DSS who handled my adoption and I was in direct contact with DSS also - I placed “waivers of confidentiality” with my current address with the DSS in August 1994 and again updated it in January 1996.
My mother visited DSS in 1996 asking for information. They did not give her any information about the State Registry as they were obliged to do (she had no clue it even existed), nor did they release my information to her as per my letters waiving confidentiality.
I guess my question is, can I do anything about this situation? I am bitter about the 12 years DSS cost us!
Chris, It is been nine years since you found my birthson for me. I think about you often and wanted to update you. We have the most wonderful and loving relationship any mother and son could have. I now have a 3-1/2 year old grand-daughter by he and his wife who was named after my middle name Elizabeth. I am best friends with his loving adoptive mother. We all spent Christmas Eve and morning together. My youngest son now 38 and my birthson are enjoying a brotherly relationship of canoeing and camping, hanging out and sharing stories of their childhoods. What a blessing. Thank you for your service.
You may use any portion of this as a testimony of your abilities to perform great services of bringing families back to gether again.
I just now mailed a hard copy of the contract this afternoon. I am so excited, it feels like Christmas, nothing makes me more happy than giving to others,, even if this turns out very bad, at least I will have given my aunt the peace of finally knowing what happened to her daughter, thank you guys so much for what you do, you changed my life 7 years ago and gave me peace, nothing is worse than not knowing. When you guys found my family for me, it opened up a giant can of worms, OMG, some really hurtful things and sad things and things that made me so...so happy I thought I could fly. I am thinking about writing a book , pretty lame right? It will be a long one, and surely not boring, anyway thank you! look forward to hearing from you. FYI I went from having one brother to having seven brothers and 3 sisters.
I am sorry that I have not written a testimonial sooner, but will do so now! I met with my mother and it was a great meeting. I brought my oldest daughter with me too. Our meeting took place in Arkansas, at my cousins home, He and his wife are two of the several family members who know about me. She is still unsure of when she will let her other nieces and nephews know, if at all. It is hard to disclose long kept secrets at 92 years of age. I am fine with whatever she decides.
My mother is scheduled for surgery this week, which was supposed to occur earlier, but is finally taking place. I am hoping she continues to stay healthy and that the surgery does not take too much out of her. We are hoping for another reunion, maybe in Massachusetts in the spring/summer, when she will meet her son-in-law and her two other grandchildren. I have also been able to do some research on my birth fathers family, I am so fortunate to have this information. I am attaching a picture of our visit for you, but
please do not include in the testimonial yet!
Here is my testimonial:
After searching for my birth mother for over 30 years, I finally turned to Kinsolving. I had followed many avenues in search of a birth parent, even going to court in the state of Illnois, all to no avail. I had some non-identifying information and my amended birth certificate. I had always suspected that my mother had given an alias for her name, but could not be sure. I also knew that I was born out of wedlock and my father had been married to someone other than my mother.
Kinsolving terminated my search this past July, since after two years they were unable to find a next of kin. In the meantime, I had given up any hope of finding my mother alive - she would now be 92 - and was hoping to possibly find half-siblings. I had also given up any hope of ever knowing who my father might be, since siblings may not have even been aware of my mothers relationship with my father. When I received the notice from Kinsolving I was very disheartened and realized I had done everything in my power to find a relative, but would have to make peace with the fact that I was unable to do so.
In late September, almost exactly two months after the Kinsolving termination, I received a call one evening from Kinsolving. He explained that while doing a search in the Chicago area, he came across my file and thought he could find some information for me. He said that while the search had technically been terminated, searches were never completely disregarded. He too, thought that my mothers name may have been an alias, but said that she would have never been able to make up the name of the town she
I was careful not to get my hopes up and thanked them for their continued effort.
Two days later I received the call I had been waiting for. Kinsolving told me they had found my mother and that she was alive, living on her own, and cognitively "with it". I was in shock, to say the least. I then received, from Kinsolving, information about my birth mother and her family, dating back to the 1800s!
Now, with her phone number in my hand, it was up to me to make the call. I waited until the evening when my husband was with me for moral support. My mother was thrilled to hear from me and said she had thought of me every day and had always hoped I would find her. She never married and had a successful career in the Chicago area for many years. At one time, we lived less than two miles apart from each other. I was a flight attendant for many years. My mother was a TWA flight attendant, and she told me my father had been a Braniff pilot. So, after 61 years of not knowing who my birth parents were, I had all the information I had been seeking. I also learned that my father had died in 1958. He had no other children either.
Since that call, I have met my lovely mother, My oldest daughter met her also, and we are trying to plan a reunion for her to meet her son- in-law and two other grandchildren. We are still getting to know each other via phone calls and letters. I have also done some research on my birth father and his family which has been enlightening.
I consider my completed search nothing short of a miracle, thanks to Kinsolving. My story has a happy ending and I only wish I had contacted Kinsolving earlier in my search.
Jeanne (Boston, MA)
Chris, & all you wonderful people who have changed my life at Kinsolving:
I do not know how to express my enormous thanks to all of you. I am forwarding some emails to you from my BM & her daughter so that you can share all the incredibly wonderful emotional experiences that are going on - that Kinsolving was responsible for:
I am having dinner with my BF in a week.
Just a short note to thank you for all of the information provided - I made contact with Ms. Keisa Tucker and have sent a request to her concerning the Intermeditary Confidential Service - I am hoping to have some siblings identified and also hoping to recieve some information on my birth parents medical history - I was very impressed with the document that you sent me - I have been reading and re-reading and you are right - I was a bit overwhelmed with all of the information but it was worth reading over several times. You and your team really did a great service for me and I now know at least where my roots are.
Again, Thanks for you professional help.
Wow, she has been right under me the whole time. I went to college two blocks away from her pervious address in Northridge CA from 1993 - 1997. Chris you are absolutely amazing and I will never be able to
thank you enough.
I am still amazed at the speed and professionalism of your service – and so grateful to you. Although my parents are both dead at least I know now who they were, and I have the opportunity to reunite with my family on both sides.
Thank you so much for everything. Hiring Kinsolving was the best thing I could have done.
Good morning, Kinsolving miracle workers!
I had the best conversations with my birth-mother over the weekend. We spoke and laughed for over 4 hours. I have looked for so so long and I
certainly would never have found her.
Hi! I am an (Adoptee) and I am a member of Orphan Voyage in Jacksonville, FL. We told our group about your help with searches and I know a few of our members have used your help from time to time. I give your name to everyone that calls me now for information. People are just not coming to the groups anymore but I still get the phone calls for help.
I just want to thank you for your important work. I personally am very grateful for all that you do to help people. I believe in your mission. Please let me know if there is any support that I can give to your important work other than giving your name and number to those who ask for help. I was able to search and find my birth family and I have constant contact with them and have even been to a couple of FAMILY REUNIONS! They are in Winston-Salem, NC!! I have five whole sibblings.
God bless you and thank you!
I wanted to thank you so much for the work you do. Last week I contacted my birthson..and even though he was not aware he was adopted he was thrilled to hear from me. I know this is just a start and things always have the potential to sour (like in all families) ...but right now he is totally open to his new family and has embraced me and his siblings. I could not have imagined a better response. And none of this would be possible without your hard work and for that I will be eternally grateful! Thank you.
It has been a busy day! I sent photos to my BM this week (she will receive them tomorrow) & I received photos from her. It is so incredible to see a slight resemblance in my BM. She also sent me photos of her children which I do not see a resemblance (different fathers). I made a second call to her today to tell her that I received the photos she sent. It was a great phone call, obviously she was much more talkative than the first time. She discussed her children, grandchildren & great grandchild. She told me her son worked as a Letter Carrier in the USPS & so did I for 3 years! She also told me that she does not know whether my BF will acknowledge me as he did not want a family back then. She hoped he had mellowed & had a family.
I had planned to call my BF today but got nervous after my BM phone call. I waited an hour & wanted to speak with you, but decided to just go for it - amnesia of the zipper or not. His wife answered & I asked for my BF by name. He was shocked when I told him. He told me that he knew that she was pregnant when he went off to the war but lost touch after that. We chatted for a very short time & he asked for my phone # & told me that he would call me back. He called back in 5 minutes & was confused why it took me so long to find him. I realized after talking to him that I had left out that my BM had put me up for adoption & he was shocked again. He felt badly but I assured him that I had wonderful parents & a wonderful childhood! He was happy & told me that he has to take a little time to process this & when was the best time to call me back. I can just imagine the conversations going on in that household this evening!!!!!!!
Thank you for your excellent coaching. I think it went well on both ends. Will keep you posted.....My life feels so rich thanks to all of you,
As far as contacting I knew the correct protocol (contact the birth mother and only the birth mother) but I just had a feeling it would work out.
They called me yesterday. After all the reunions I have heard about from my various adoptee friends, this one has to be one of the most low key ones. No crying and blubbering, no overt panic. Her personality must be very similar to mine. They want to meet me and my husband. They are not going to tell their sons until after they meet me. I do not know why, but okay. I got the impression that He was more keen on having me in their lives than she was. I guess she is the cautious one - like me.
So reading what you have read about her from my non-ID, would you have expected her to have an MBA in Finance? Well, she does. He was the mathematician (which I knew),She was an actuary and He was a CPA.
So she was surprised but not surprised that I was a CPA with an MBA. It must be the genes.
Thanks again! I am still in shock and simply cannot believe you could do it.
Christine, Thank you so much for this. I will send you a progress update on what happens from this point forward.
I would like to personally thank you for closing a huge door that was open in my life. While I know there are many other challenges that I might face meeting my family, you have given me for the first time in my life information on who I am as a person and the hope I can finally see other people who I resemble and understand who and what I am.
God bless you
Thank you so much for all you have done. I hope we can finish these two others also.
It has been an emotional last two months. Mere words cannot express my gratitude for all the information you provided me on my biological family. I had searched on my own for so long and within two days you provided me with a wealth of information, far exceeding my expectations! As Chris suggested, I had a planned script in case I ever got to talk to Mr. C. I made several attempts to no avail until this last weekend. I actually saw him in his home. He ended up inviting me into his home, shared more pictures
with me of my biological Mom. I had pictures of me at the same age as one he shared with me and the resemblance is uncanny. When he opened the door and I started talking he just kept looking at me and finally he took my hand in both of his and invited me in. There is more to this story that he shared with me regarding my adoption. He will be 92 this year and is still very, very sharp mentally and appears to be in physically good shape. He said he is not the biological father and and had another story to tell regarding this. I would like to share it with you if you care to hear. Whatever happens, I feel I have been given a marvelous gift. Thanks for opening the door so I could glimpse of my past.
I am forever grateful,
I have intended to write before now, but have been in such a happy fog, I did not get to it. My daughter and I have communicated briefly since Dec. 23 and I hope to meet her soon.The holidays, etc. have prevented that from happening, as yet. She, her husband and my son did meet for lunch and had a wonderful, fun time. He said they just kept staring at each other...was a bit like looking into a mirror. She is almost identical in looks and personality to my youngest daughter. Both my other two daughters have sent her lots of pictures and they are slowly getting to know each other. We are trying to take this by baby steps...not wanting to completely overwhelm her or ourselves, but I can hardly wait to spend some time with her in person. I am amazed that we have practically lived in each others back yards for most of these years, she and my son were at the same college at the same time (they both breathed a sigh of relief that they did not date each other!!!).....on and on it goes.
So..........now I have 4 children and 8 grandchildren...how wonderful. I can not thank you enough for having the know-how to get this done. Keep doing it ...you are changing lives for the better.
There is no way that I can ever thank you enough for the search. You have made my life complete
After 9 long months, I had nearly given up hope. Then Kinsolving gave me the most amazing gift ever by solving my case – and offered counseling on how to initiate contact.
Dear Christine, I am not sure if you remember me or not- I hired you back in (I believe 2002) to find my birth mother. I had spent months searching for her- visiting the hospital I was born in, searching adoption sites online, visiting with the lawyer who handled the adoption, and even placing an ad in the paper...with no luck. However, you found her within 2 days. Amazing. Since then I have had some wonderful conversations with her and have exchanged pictures on several occasions. She has had an incredibly difficult life in so many ways, but was so incredibly relieved to hear from me. To be able to say "thank you" to her was just amazing. It has been a very slow and emotional process but I plan to go to visit her this summer to finally meet with her in person. I cannot thank you enough for the closure and relief that your services brought me.
Jessica, New York
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